Why you Don’t & Won’t Have What you Want by The Mistress Didi* is an excerpt from Her Ask Mistress Didi* Mentoring blog.
Q: Dear Mistress Didi,
Dear Mistress Didi*,
You were unfair to dismiss me… i tried my best to serve You… You didn’t give me a chance… [Other whining without acknowledging responsibility omitted.]
‑ “pitty-me” sub
I encourage people, especially Dominants, to pass this on to subs, “wanna-subs,” and others who dare to attempt to guilt You into tolerating their abominable behaviors.
I am consistent for a reason: to maintain the excellence of My Domain on My terms and to thwart whining attempts to top from the bottom and other idiot behaviors by manipulative creatures. The Rules of My Domain are provided to EVERYONE, listed on My websites, and even listed on The DommeSalon™ site so that there are NO valid reasons nor opportunities for irresponsible, whiny, outrage that you do not have what you want — and you never will — not from Me or anyone of value.
I am unique. I take the time to be as clear as possible by writing My requirements and making them available to EVERY person who desires to be a part of My Domain and I also make My Rules publicly available. VERY few Dominants do this – why they don’t baffles Me when the practice cuts down on the fakers, shakers, and annoyance makers. The process I use for My Rules is consistent with how I run My Domain and My businesses. I seldom, if ever, deviate from this process because it is the deal-breaker when people want to “work their idiocy.”
When your intention is to use a situation to accommodate who you think you are without respect for the situation, you deny the opportunity for growth of any kind and you will always end up being deficient from the same pattern of behavior as demonstrated by your failure in My Domain:
1) you psyche yourself into believing you are worthy of a situation that thrills you – that you do NOT have in your life, but which you DO want. Many people see a BDSM movie and, just because they think they are amused by identifyng with a Dominant or get a stirring in their loins from thoughts of being a submissive, they believe that they ARE already this fantasy as a reality. Foolishly, because you know that you’re full of XXXX, you want to believe that I am – though I repeat Myself when I tell everyone that this world and way of being is My REALITY AND MY LIFESTYLE.
I often encounter this scenario with newbie Dominants who, after seeking My counsel and tutelage, get carried away and think they can tell ME how to be a Domme… What’s worse are the ones who forget their manners and dare to think they can dick-tate the terms of Our relationship to Me (see Confusing Dominance For Bullying).
2) you RECEIVE AND AGREE to My Rules, which I email to you prior to permitting you to connect with Me for service and you say anything to get moving on your scheme of crazy thinking that I will acquiesce to the ridiculous standards that you are accustomed to with the silly females (and males) in your life.
What always amazes Me is how any of you can think that you are so “special” that I will suddenly NOT maintain the Domain I’ve built and have sustained for the greater part of My life because you popped up wanting the same thing I’ve heard for many years and continue to hear day in and day out. None of you are ever original; same stupidity, different moron.
REMEMBER: you want What I Have and Who I Am because on your deepest level, you know that the value given to you by the silly females/males in your realm is FALSE. you need Me and Mine to desperately try to convince yourself otherwise. you should be grateful to these silly people and treat them better. Their delusional love for and about you may be all you have to get you through your life. While less than what you want and deserve, atleast, be worthy of them.
3) you LIE and attempt to cheat by not honoring your agreement/following instructions and try to shirk your responsibility in all aspects of the scenario. Worse, you dare to pull a “brat attack.” I do not see how anyone with an iota of intelligence can think that I will be guilty for NOT accepting your choice to be inferior.
4) Soon, you realize that you’ve dug your own grave because, again, I HAVE WHAT you WANT, NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND. I graciously gave you the chance to step up and show up to be worthy of what you want and you failed. That recognition of your reality is going to eat at you for an eternity. Why? Because:
- you maintain delusions of believing you are greater than you will ever be because you do NO work to be better;
- you will always be inferior because you are lazy and ludicrous; and
- you refuse to accept personal responsibility for your failings and, therefore, will fail in your goals by either doing a half-azzed job which will result in ineptitude or by not realizing them at all. you will remain a loser.
5) When you fail in your pathetic tirade to Me, you run to any and every loser who will gobble your maligning tales against Me like the toxic, gluttons they are. you will then foolishly believe that you found your niche and a “community” where you can live out your fantasies. The only thing you will find are others who mirror your inadequacies. your reputation will become known by Quality Fetishists and humans, who will shun you. The more you associate with slime, the faster your lack of value will be noticeable by those who actually have what you desire.
Think of it this way: puss starts small and expands –> gangrene –> amputation –> discard of the useless appendage –> beauty marred and functionality impaired –> life sux more and is harder.
IMPORTANT NOTE: This analogy is meant to connect a personality defect to the physical level for better conceptual comprehension. If you are a soldier who lost a limb(s) honorably, NO ONE OF VALUE will consider you less beautiful and definitely not less functional because soldiers are miraculous people who CAN do anything. Remove your greatness from anyone who does not appreciate you. This is why it is so important for Us to SUPPORT OUR TROOPS, VOTE FOR Veteran Benefits, and pay attention towho/which pundits do not (always the same creatures who want to send everyone else’s children to war).
While there are a lot like you, there is only one Me. you will quickly be replaced by those who are always waiting in line to serve Me and those who follow The Rules are always granted sanctuary in My Domain. Those who enact the mediocre behaviors that define you will join you in the world of sleaze, greed, and irresponsible dangers parading as fetishists in the world today.
- you are delusional in your views of yourself and when given the opportunity to indulge in what someone else created that you want, you refuse to do any work to be worthy of it;
- you lack respect for what you want and those who have created it and you lie, cheat, and attempt to defame when you fail; and
- you refuse to accept personal responsibility for your failings and you will remain a pathetic loser.
AGAIN, I advise you to download and read My Complimentary Fetish Etiquette Guide, How To Present yourself To A Mistress.