Tag Archives: integrity

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New Administration – HURRY!

Coming Soon: New Administration

I’ve been approached by an organization that has expressed an interest in becoming the new administrators for this site.  Therefore, I recommend that You:

  • Join the The Domina101™ Collective to commune with Female Dominants to learn and share Life Knowledge, techniques, and general-how-to information with Quality Fetishists; and
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Check current Workshops and Events!

All THE BEST,
Mistress Didi*


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Tips For How You Express Yourself

by Mistress Didi*

THE most important thing a Domme can do is to develop Herself – which means to develop Her own Self-Control (starting with avoiding being needy and focus on being choosey) because the truth about Control is there is only Self-Control = what you will and will not allow.

To ensure that You communicate clearly and present Yourself from a place of authority — which is something the new Domina can often have difficulty with — remember:

1)  Please consider VERY carefully how you communicate.  Choose your words carefully and monitor your tone.  You don’t want to come across as desperate because that attracts trolls and worse;

2)  Be careful of whom you trust.  Most of these jokers talk a good game – especially when they believe that You don’t know any better.  So, make them prove worthy of Your attention.  This practice weeds out the fakers-takers-shakers-noise-makers; and

3)  Please read Safety Tips For Dommes.

These steps will offer You comfort and build Your confidence so that it is easier to pay attention to what is actually being said and offered, rather than getting carried away in the notion of “having submissives.”

A Gift from The Mistress Didi*

I conduct Mentoring and Training classes and workshops in person and via webcam. I’ve also created The Domina101™ Collective as an opportunity for Female Dominants to learn and share Life Knowledge, techniques, and general-how-to information from and with Quality Fetishists.

The following is a Domina101™ Mentoring Program Preparation Guide to assist You in becoming clear on Your goals so that You may clearly communicate them.

Download or Read Online a
Complimentary Domina101™ Prep Guide

and utilize

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Pet Peeves of Cyberland Fetish Sites by Dame Tyler

by Dame Tyler

1. People who have never been to sm parties and munches telling others what to do, how to dress, how to behave and what happens at sm parties and munches.

If you’ve never been there, you wouldn’t know. If you speak only on the subjects you actually have experience and knowledge of, you wouldn’t be saying much of anything in any of the threads on anything.

<closes eyes and dreams of a moment like that>

2. People who have never been to a slave auction telling other people how a slave auction works.

If you’ve never attended one, you wouldn’t know.

3. People who have only ever done cam/online bdsm telling those in face to face, physically present relationships they’re doing it wrong.

If you’ve never actually done anything with another person you could touch, you wouldn’t know how it’s “supposed” to go with someone you can touch.

4. People who say they are no limits but then say one of the rules they have is to “protect the property, even if it means protecting the property from him.”

Guess what? You are saying you can enforce a limit. If you’re standing in the middle of the road because he told you to and a car is coming and you get out of the way of that car even though he told you to stand there, you have set a limit. Your limit is that you will not let yourself be hit by a car even if he told you to.

5. People who get upset when others mention how long they’ve been doing this SM stuff or how long they’ve been in a relationship.

Newsflash! — The people posting in the thread aren’t posting for the benefit of other posters responding to the same questions. They’re posting for the benefit of the OP who asked the question.

That OP (original poster) might be brand new to the group and may never have seen any of the posters before. They wouldn’t know one from another and wouldn’t know who has practical experience and who doesn’t. So while you may frequently see someone say they’ve been in a relationship for 7 years but have been doing this for 15, the person who matters (the one who asked the questions in the first place) has never seen it said by any of those people.

People who are proud of their relationships say how many years they’ve been in that relationship. They say how long they’ve been together, how long married. It’s a relatable context that other humans understand. It’s merely a statement of fact, not something said just to annoy you personally.

If you get upset by others stating their years of experience or years in a relationship, that reaction is about you. Not the other person.

6. People who bitch about dudes having their dick for an avatar but they themselves are flashing tits or a nipple or their bare ass.

Dude shows his dick and you flash your tits. There’s really no difference. Personally, I don’t want to see either one. How about both of ya put that shit away.

7. People with no or very limited practical bdsm or d/s/m/s relationship experience telling others what they must do in their relationships and deciding the definitions of terms for everyone else.

Broken record time. If you’ve never had a d/s relationship or an m/s relationship, you have no business telling others what rules or protocols they must have or what that relationship must look like. Each house and each relationship gets to decide all that stuff for themselves.

8. Chicks who flash their tits and then whine that someone looked at their tits and made a crass comment.

Set it to friends only! Crass dudes are going to say crass things. Been that way for 20,000 years and will be that way for the next 20,000 years. You can teach 49,999 dudes to be civil and there will always be that ONE who will remain an ass regardless. If you cannot handle that one, then don’t post the pics or make it so that person cannot see the pic. Problem solved.

9. People with no practical experience extolling the “subby has the power” thing.

That goes right out the window when you’re standing in front of a dom who tells you to do something and stands there until you do it and doesn’t back down because you weren’t “feeling it”.

Subby has the power right up to the moment he/she says “Yes, I’ll be yours.” Then that power is gone, because you gave it to the dom, and you’re expected to do what you’re told (within reason) and (dare I say it) serve the dominant rather than yourself.

10. People who think the word submit means “only do what I want to the degree I want.”

Submission means doing what someone else wants, whether you like it or not. Pick your battles rather than making everything an ultimatum and a battle of wills. A d/s relationship is supposed to be about cooperation, not re-enacting the Battle of Hastings every damn time the dom wants something.

11. People who put the word submissive next to their name and then say the dom “has to make me” submit.

If they have to make you, then you are not submissive. Submissive means you do it of your own accord because you were told to by an authority figure.

“Make me” means you’re looking to have a battle and be subjugated. It also means you want the dom to perform for you how you want them to.

12. People who think making a cartoon avatar kneel to another cartoon avatar is a real d/s relationship.

It’s not. It’s playing an interactive RPG on the computer. Nothing more.

It’s a whole other thing when you’re actually in front of the person and kneeling and looking up into their face and knowing they’re about to lay hands on you in a manner possibly of violence…and you’re not going to stop it. There’s no on/off switch. There’s no internet connection to suddenly lose. There’s no employer to conveniently call you into work.

You’re there and you actually have to do all that stuff you pretended to make a cartoon character do.

Very different indeed.

13. People who denigrate those who win awards for their work and accomplishments.

Just because you can’t see beyond the edge of your own relationship doesn’t mean the rest of us have to live in a bubble of isolation too. You may not see the value in entering various master/slave, puppy, pony, etc competitions, but that doesn’t mean there is no value in those things.

People are allowed to be proud of themselves for the things they worked hard at and other people have voted for and judged and decided they are the best.

If you get upset that others are winning awards and are proud of it, when you never even entered, that says more about you than it does about them. It’s your issue and your negative attitude, not theirs.

14. People who use after care as blackmail.

“If I let you play with me for half an hour, you have to give me three days of pampering” gets so fucking old. If you want a relationship, you’re not going to get it through casual play and unreasonable demands of after-pandering.

If you can’t deal with the ramifications of the play you ASKED FOR, then you don’t need to be playing at this bdsm stuff. This is serious shit we’re doing. It’s not for the faint of heart.

Just because a couple movies made it look like fun hawtness doesn’t mean everyone in the world could or SHOULD be doing it.

15. People who think poly means they can hump everyone in the world.

Poly is a series of relationships too. If you just want to be slut of the world, then say so. Using the world poly as an excuse to slut around disrespects those who work hard at their relationships.

16. People who think wearing a collar will solve all their problems and make life easier.

It doesn’t. Those same problems will still be there and you’ll still have to deal with them. A leather band around your neck or a change in your screen name won’t make them magically poof out of existence.

17. People who think being dominant means perfect and mind reader.

So not going to happen. Doms are people. They have bad moments. They have bad days. They forget things just like everyone else. They’re not clairvoyant. They cannot know something is amiss unless the bottom/sub/slave speaks up.

18. People saying they’re no limits BECAUSE he’s not off his rocker and won’t chop off a limb.

Just because he won’t do an insane thing doesn’t mean the sub is no limits. No limits means the sub WOULD do that thing IF he said he wanted to. Not having limits has nothing to do with what the dom will or won’t do. It has everything to do with what the sub/slave WILL do.

19. People who are bisexual and poly and get mad at others for being monogamous and heterosexual.

Ya know what? Their heterosexuality is so totally NOT about you. It’s about them. And it’s not their problem that you don’t like that they wouldn’t fuck you for all the tea in China. They wouldn’t fuck ANYONE of the same sex for all the tea in China, so that excludes half the people in the world.

And the monogamous part means EVERYONE in the world is excluded except ONE person. GET OVER IT! Their monogamy has nothing to do with you personally.

20. People who have never done a thing deciding for others what is or is not safe.

If you’ve never done it, you wouldn’t know. I’ve never done needle play. You don’t see me telling others how to have safe needle play. I’ve never done suspension. You don’t see me telling other people how to safely perform Shibari.

If you’ve never done it, shut the fuck up already.

You’re NOT helping. In fact, you’re hurting the efforts of those who actually have done it and really do know. You’re muddying the waters by providing erroneous information and passing it off as gospel.

21. People who think everyone comes to the site just to find someone to fuck and that there is no other valid reason to be here.

Social website, nimrod.  Says right there in the TOU (Terms of Use).

Social means sharing the many aspects of our lives and not just the one thing many of us have in common – liking to fuck.

22. Women who don’t like penetration for more than five minutes, can’t stand cum on them, who are in a relationship solely with their vibrator…yelling at men who do want to have sex.

Just because you don’t like to fuck doesn’t mean other people can’t mention sex around you. Why are you here on this site if you’re so sex-negative in the first place?

It may not be a hook-up site, but it’s sure centered around all things sex and kink-positive. So if you’re actually NOT a sexual being and you hate all things having to do with sex and you’re NOT kinky, don’t go to events, don’t meet people, are not a toppish person and not a bottomish person…then why are taking up space here?

I’m an Atheist. You don’t see me going to Christian websites and then bitching that people are interested in and are talking about Christ.

That’s what you’re doing here.

23. People deciding for others who is real or not based solely on whether or not they have public face pics.

So very erroneous.

Not having a face pic you can see doesn’t mean I’ve not caned and beaten bloody all those asses I’ve caned and beaten bloody. It doesn’t mean I’ve not attended two parties a month for two years or been in the public scene for five years. Doesn’t mean I’ve not sold all those floggers I made for eight years.

Not having a face pic you can see doesn’t mean I’ve not been in the relationships I’ve been in and that I’ve not done the things I’ve done.

Rather the reverse. It is BECAUSE of the things I do that you cannot see my face.

When we meet face to face, THEN you can see my face. What are the odds of that happening? Slim and nil, because you are hundreds of miles away.

When you send me a friend request and I accept it, THEN you can see my face. What are the odds of that? Slim and nil. Remember, you think I’m not real because I’m not blasting my face for three million people I don’t know to see. So I guess you’re just shit outta luck because I already know what a closed-minded ass you are and I don’t friend closed-minded asses.

24. People who have never met, who conduct their d/s relationship entirely online, saying they’re in a long distance relationship.

If you’d met and then separated for whatever reason (military, job transfer, etc) and were maintaining the relationship until you could be together again, I’d agree.

But if you’ve never met the person in the first place and there’s no plan to permanently be together in the flesh, then it’s nothing more than a cyberland relationship. It’s a dead-end piece of hot air.

25. Women who had one weekend with a dude five states away two years ago and think that qualifies them to speak on all things about being a 24/7 slave.

No, it doesn’t. Really, it doesn’t. You’re qualified to speak on visiting someone for a weekend and flying home and returning to your existing life. Nothing more.

26. People who come to the site wondering what a sub is (or what a dom is), proclaiming they are the bestest sub (or dom) in the world three weeks later, decrying all others who don’t sub (or dom) like they do (even though they haven’t actually done it with anyone yet), who then complain they’ve had four blind dates and nothing came of it, and two weeks after that they’re the perfect slave (or master) for every occasion and two weeks after that, they’re a pro dom.

Schizophrenia is a treatable condition. Please look into it.

27. People who post to a group of thousands of complete strangers to get validation for their own bad behavior and so they can point the BAD DOM or BAD SUB finger at their partner.

Settle that shit between yourselves.

I don’t agree with taking “house business” to the intertubez for resolution in the first place. I’m not part of your relationship. Those thousands of other strangers are not part of your relationship. We don’t know the other person. We don’t have all the facts and we never will because you’re going to hold back the parts that make you look worse and you’re going to play up the parts that make them look worse.

28. People who take themselves so super serial seriously that they get themselves into a frothing, apoplectic fit when other people post opinions and experience counter to their own.

It’s just a website, people. No one is going to like all the sex things you like. No one is going to have all the exact kinks you do. No one is going to think exactly the same way about exactly the same things, either positive or negative.

And that’s okay! The personal opinions of others are NOT a personal affront toward you.

No one’s opinions have any impact on your own life. Honest.

——————————————————————————–

Dame Tyler's PEEPERDame Tyler is a real-world, experienced sadomasochist who’s been doing this stuff almost literally half Her life. Author of the award winning books Peeper and Arlyn the Deliverer, She is forever writing and will no doubt die with a pen in Her hand and a thesaurus open on Her thigh. She also crochets, quilts and bakes. You can  donate supplies for Dame Tyler’s Charity Works.  Check it all out HERE!

Mistress Nia’s Email Etiquette Rules

English: email envelope

compiled by Mistress Nia, 2009

It is important that when you make contact with me for consideration as a member of my household that you follow basic etiquette. Know that how you type, and the efforts you make or don’t make will indicate if you are a knowledgeable and polite person.

Read my entire profile and peruse my writings first. Make sure that you know what I am looking for so that you don’t waste your time or mine. If you are still not certain, please ask.

Make sure your message includes a gracious greeting and conclusion.

Assume the highest level of formality with me until the relationship dictates otherwise. My preferences are Ma’am, Ms., or Ms. Nia. Refrain from getting too informal too soon.

Be sure the Subject: field accurately reflects the content of your email. A few well-chosen words are all that are necessary.

Until we are well acquainted, avoid using abbreviations, such as IMHO (in my humble opinion) or TTYL (talk to you later). Don’t assume that I am familiar with them.

Emails with typos are simply not taken as seriously. Take time to spell and grammar check, if you expect me to take my time to read it.

Don’t over or under-use punctuation. It takes me that much longer to process what you are trying say.

If you are sending an attachment, make note of it and describe what the attachment is for in the body. I am very wary of attachments due to the threat of computer viruses.

Be sure that you understand the meaning of every word you use. There are too many Internet sources so you cannot claim ignorance or no resources.

Read your email out loud to ensure the feeling is that which you desire. I realize that it is challenging to capture nuances of mood and feeling with messages and will make some allowances. However, a few additions of the words “please” and “thank you” go a long way!

Never assume the intent of an email from me. If you are not sure – ask!

If your email is emotionally charged, walk away from the computer and wait to reply. Review my email again so that you are sure you are not reading anything into the email that simply isn’t there.

Don’t hesitate to say thank you, how are you, or appreciate your response and generally end your emails with something gracious.

Just because I don’t ask for a response doesn’t mean that I don’t expect one. Always acknowledge my emails in a timely manner. Three days is acceptable; seven to ten days if unable to sign on due to life-in-general issues.

Posting or forwarding of private email is downright rude. You need to request and receive my permission first!

Peace & Blessings,
Mistress Nia

Originally posted March 6, 2010
Last update July 6, 2013

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Never Judge a Book By It’s Cover by HydroMadam

by HydroMadam

I am not a long legged Domme wearing black leather and sporting a whip….

I was once, many years ago but not anymore.

Now, I describe myself as a mature woman, on the plump side, considered by most to be very nice and caring. 

A true statement, but it doesn’t sound like what you picture when you think “Dominant Woman”.

How about this, I’m a lady, with a sweet smile, very creative and “a strong right hand.” 

Sounding better?

I love role-play. I’m the teacher, the nanny, the neighbor and you, You, have done something wrong.

It is up to me to give you exactly what you deserve.

No mundane rules, no bowing, no kneeling.

You will enter the room knowing that once you close the door you are under my control.

Good, bad. Right, wrong.

Your comeuppance is imminent. Whatever that may be.  🙂

Dominant women are everywhere, looks can be deceiving.

***

Posers, players, pranksters & banksters by Robin Adams

Posers, players, pranksters & banksters – New Moon @ 21 Aquarius/Chinese New Year – January 20013, re-posted with permission

NOTE: There is no need to understand the astrological specifics to gain the tremendous value of this insight.

~~~~~~~

Lyrics: Lee Brice – Hard to Love

“I am insensitive, I have a tendency to pay more attention to the things that I need.  Sometimes I drink too much, sometimes I test your trust, sometimes I don’t know why you stay with me.  I’m hard to love, hard to love, no, I don’t make it easy.  I couldn’t do it if I stood where you stood.  I’m hard to love, hard to love, you say that you need me, I don’t deserve it but I love that you love me, girl.”

Codependence is an emotional defense system set up to protect our wounded inner child from the shame of being exposed as unlovable and unworthy, stupid and weak, a loser and failure, or whatever message we received.  We were taught how to determine our own self-worth by comparing ourselves to others.   Am I “smarter than, prettier than, faster than, richer than, more successful than, thinner than, stronger than,” you get the picture?   In a codependent society the only way to feel good about “me” is to look down on someone else.  Thus we learned to judge (just as our primary caretakers did) others in order to feel good about ourselves.  Being “right” was one of the most important ways to know that “I have worth.

The state of our relationships in our society is going through a metamorphosis as we relax into the tension of change and flux, compliments of Uranus squaring Pluto.  Moving from the dysfunctional mode of “power over another” into a state of “sharing power with another” is going to take time.  Coming into the 4th of 5 New Moons at 21 degrees we are but one month away from the completion of this particular cycle of shedding an emotional skin.

I can’t think of a more appropriate symbol for this transition period than the symbol for the upcoming Chinese New Year, the year of the Snake.  It’s time to shed!  The snake sheds its skin on a regular basis and is temporarily blinded as it goes through the process.  Aquarius is an Air sign and the Aquarius symbol is of a woman pouring water from the heavens onto the EarthAs above, so below and this year we are focusing on “as within, so without.”  That’s the big Cosmic Joke.  From this point forward the work we do will be done “within,” slow, steady sensible and practical!

Posers, players, pranksters and banksters can only succeed when we continue responding in the traditional dysfunctional manner.   The New Moon is in multi-dimensional Aquarius @ 21 degrees, which is ruled by Uranus (surprise/serendipity) and Saturn (time/generations), our hosts of this event.  Here’s the deal.  It takes 6 months to 1 year to integrate a new vibratory harmonic.  We’re speaking of Uranus square Pluto.  A surprise is due for the new 1% who currently are redefining the meaning of wealth.

What if the word “wealth” meant, “to have something that money cannot buy,” and it defined the new 1%?  What would we call the 99%?  Where would you fall in the 47% of the US population that depends on the government to take care of them?  That changes the whole equation.  See, there we go again comparing ourselves to someone else.  It’s a great big ole’ dis-function (Pluto) to fill the pockets of the media companies (Uranus) to ensure that we continue our main diet of TV, smartphones and internet.  They educate us through advertising and keep us plugged into the mentality that there is something “out there” that will make “me happy inside.”  That’s an interesting thought isn’t it?  If I diss you I feel better about me.  Perfect dysfunction!

Relationships of power (Scorpio) are based on someone being right OR wrong.  There can’t be a winner without there being a loser.  Handing over one’s power to someone else to make oneself happy is what we were taught as children.  Remember the childhood fairy tales we were told?  It’s a magic formula for writers; boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl back and they ride off into the sunset, right?  There was always a winner, a loser and a “happy ever after.”  Happiness comes from within and our true wealth is happiness that cannot be purchased with money.

Saturn is our legacy and is sitting at 11 Scorpio preparing to Rx on the 18th, which also just happens to be the degree of the upcoming November 3, 2013 New Moon Eclipse.  We are laying a foundation for change in November.  It’s always a cycle within a cycle and it’s time to shed some of our inhibitions with the main guideline being to “do no harm.”  Life unfolds in stages.  Finding the balance between co-dependence and counter-dependence is a “walk of art.”  It takes conscious effort and a whole lot of practice.  Since we were all taught that “the relationship” is the goal we have set ourselves up from the get-go to be disappointed because someone else “can’t make me happy.”  Uh-oh!

It’s the race between what can’t be and what is emerging that is unfolding before our very eyes.  Since there are so few examples of relationships that share power it’s no wonder many choose to fill their lives with friendships and family as their source of full-fill-ment.    Many are happier being a whole person rather than half a couple!  From 0 Aquarius to 8 Pisces there are 8 planets, lights and asteroids; Asteroid DNA, Venus, Mercury, Sun, Neptune, Chiron, Mars and the New Moon.  That is a great deal of focus in Aquarius (multiple dimensions) and Pisces (mirrors).

“I am a short fuse. I am a wrecking ball crashing into your heart like I do.  You’re like a Sunday morning full of grace and full of Jesus.  I wish that I could be more like you.  I’m hard to love, hard to love, no, I don’t make it easy.  I couldn’t do it if I stood where you stood, I’m hard to love, hard to love.  You say that you need me, I don’t deserve it but I love that you love me, girl.  Love me, girl.”

Mercury (listening), Mars (action) and Chiron (what I can’t give myself but I can give to you) in Pisces are going to bring a significant topic of discussion about the changes that need to be made between “you and me.”  Depending on how co-dependent we are functioning will determine the discussion between “you and me.”  There’s a better than average chance that many will be disappointed in the person/group/cause that they handed their power over to and expected to find happiness in exchange for giving the power away.  We are not halves that cannot be whole without a relationship and there is no goal to take us to “happily ever after.

The New Moon @ 21 Aquarius is at a very tense angle to the Nodes (Soul blueprint/comfort zone) @ 21 Scorpio (within)/Taurus (without), and Venus (my relationship to love & money) is squaring Saturn (consequences for my actions).  It’s time for us to begin recognizing the difference between a healthy relationship and a toxic relationship.  Physics require tension to make something happen, to create movement, to change.  Everyone is now ready as we head toward the next and last New Moon at 21 Pisces next month.  Shed!  If we weren’t taught what is real and what is toxic, how do we recognize it?  Like you, I am very familiar with toxic relationships and they are easy to spot when you know what to look for.

A true relationship is the development of a self- first priority while toxic relationships are the obsession with “getting a relationship.”  True relationships have room to grow and expand but a toxic relationship finds security and comfort in sameness and this intensity of need is seen as proof of love (read the song lyrics again).  If it’s real we’re happy with our different interests, friends and we maintain other meaningful relationships/friendships.   Toxic relationships are comprised of total involvement with little or no other social life and we let old friends and interests fall by the wayside.

Real relationships encourage one another, trust one another, will compromise and negotiate, you know, take turns.  Toxic relationships don’t like change, are jealous or possessive and one tries to control another through shame or blame.  Sex is a gift given in a real relationship, but a toxic relationship will pressure another for it.  Anyone who tries to manipulate (Scorpio) you by making you feel bad about yourself is very toxic.

Our relationships with others are a reflection of how we relate to self.  It’s all part of the dysfunction and everyone on this spaceship we call Earth suffers from one form of dysfunction or another.  If we don’t start facing it and talking about it will take forever to heal ourselves.  Pay attention this week because we will all notice the tension building.  We shed the skin of dysfunction when we recognize that someone is affecting us.

If you find yourself feeling hurt, scared and angry there are questions that need to be addressed.  “What button just got pushed?  Why am I reacting so strongly to this?  How old do I feel right now?  In what way does what is happening feel like something that happened in my childhood?  How does this remind me of the way my parents acted or treated me?”  All these questions lead us within, where we keep the truth from others and ourselves at times.  The longest distance we will ever travel is the 18 inches from “head to heart.”  Connect and shed! Balance!

I bring all of this to your attention because for 5 months the Universe has been nudging us to make changes in our point of view to see how we have perpetuated the lie (Scorpio) taught to us by multiple generations (Saturn).  Next month all the planets will be in one sign Pisces.  Talk about the Universe squeezing us!   The news will be filled with all kinds of stories about the players, posers, pranksters and banksters who are trying to get power or who are losing power.  Who has power over your life?  The New Moon sets the tone for the coming 4 weeks, so ride the wave as best you can and please, please be kind to yourself as you go through the process of shedding the dysfunction this month.  Stop comparing yourself to others!  It’s a no-win situation, I promise!    Everybody’s a winner when we are honest with selfAll our relationships are a reflection of the past in the present!  Happy “NEW YOU” Year!

“Girl, you’ve given me a million second chances and I don’t ever wanna take you for granted, I’m just a man, I’m just a man.  Hard to love, hard to love, oh, I don’t make it easy and I couldn’t do it if I stood where you stood.  I’m hard to love, hard to love and you say that you need me.  I don’t deserve it but I love that you love me, girl.  You love me, girl.”

~~~~~~

Click to Visit for more of Robin Adams’ amazing and on-point insights:

Tips To Avoid Mistakes That Dommes Make by Madam Zee

by Madam Zee: March 16, 2008 ~ used with permission

  • Know what you really want.  Don’t choose something because others do it or because you think you should.
  • Clearly communicate your desires.  Don’t expect people to read your mind or know what you want.
  • Learn as much as you can about as much as you can.  The more you know, the better your experiences will be.
  • Learn from a variety of sources.  Different people have different things to offer on the same subjects.
  • Stay away from gossip.  Don’t believe everything you hear or see.
  • Don’t expect one person to be your everything – no mater how well you train them.
  • Don’t Play angry, tired, or under the influence of any substances that change your perception and/or abilities.  SAFETY FIRST.
  • Know when to let go.
  • Be good to yourself first and others will be taken care of.
  • Choose carefully what you do and why you do it.  There’s a difference between Play and abuse.  Remember karma.
  • A loving relationship is the best relationship.